Thursday, July 12, 2012

Joshua's Story - Part Two

This is a continuation of the previous post...

I also neglected to mention something major... the birth mother and birth father had already signed away their rights by this time, and it was final.  Texas law gives the birth parents 72 hours to change their minds after signing, and that time had already elapsed by the time we got the call.

DH went to work Thursday and I was overwhelmed with trying to pack/get the house ready for me to potentially be gone for weeks (I ended up staying in Texas with Joshua for 19 days)/try to be a human being in the process.  I really don't remember what all I did.  The nursery was a mess due to the failed adoption in December.  I had kept the door closed for the last 6 months, only opening it with DH if one of our friends needed to borrow baby stuff.  So the bags were still packed for a December baby, with heavy bodysuits and fleece.  I dumped out the winter clothes into a chair and continued to load all the stuff we'd need.  Then I proceeded to carry what wasn't too heavy downstairs and out into the garage to help our loading of the SUV along.

Around 10am I got a text from DH: our social worker had called to tell us that the hospital had asked if we wanted our son circumcised, and if we did, now was the time and to call the nurse back.  As his adoptive parents, we could give permission for this.  My heart pounded as I thought about what this meant (not the nitty-gritty - poor little boy!) - this was my first task as his... mother.  It moved me with emotion to think that I could give - and needed to give - consent for this.  But then another thought flooded my mind - what if the nurse wasn't respectful of my role as his mother, the only mother he would ever know?  I prayed and called, and as it turned out, the nurse was GREAT.  Her name was Grace, and while I never got to meet her in person, she was patient, explained my son's condition (he was doing well, but was still in the NICU) and then let me speak with the doctor.  He was GREAT as well, and he thoroughly explained each step of the procedure as Texas law requires.  The procedure was scheduled that day for early evening.  We even shared a laugh about my discussing this with DH (poor little buddy)!  My phone call with the hospital was a landmark conversation to be sure, in terms of what it meant and how it was handled.  I thanked the Lord, but felt exhaustion kicking in already.  We had lightly slept the night before, and basically due to driving, that was our last full night of sleep for the next... who knows how long!!

My mind swirled with thoughts of my son... being operated on, however standard a procedure.  He was across the country, and I had just said... yes, operate on him.  Poor fella!!  I wanted to hold him right NOW.  The nurse asked me 'have you seen a picture of him yet?'  No!! I exclaimed, but we'd love to have one!  She said due to confidentiality she couldn't send one to me, but she could send one to the social worker who could then forward it on to me.  I hoped she would send one, but I never imagined that she would and I'd receive it!!  Several hours down the road, we learned what our son looked like!! It was just the inspiration we needed!! (due to adoption agency requirements, we aren't allowed to post pictures of our son in social media until the adoption is final, which is in 6 months.  I'm working on getting pics that are of just his hand, etc so that identity isn't a problem).

DH finally got home after nearly everything that could go wrong going wrong.  He's a medical professional, and it's a little hard for him to just pick up and head out of town on a dime.  I wanted to get on the road but I kept praying, Lord keep me calm and KEEP MY MIND ON WHAT I NEED TO  DO, not on what's happening.  By the time he got home, I had backed the SUV in and brought out everything I could carry into the garage for expert loading by the expert.

Finally, we were ready to leave.  It was around 3:00pm, and we had a 15 hour drive ahead of us.  But for the moment, all was good.  We were out of here!  Here come mommy and daddy, Joshua!!